April Fool's Day Trick FAIL

Okay. Usually I don't do April Fool's jokes on people.

This time was the exception.  

I was googling good jokes and pranks to play on my friends for the next day when I found the mayonnaise one.  

(BTW google is my go-to for many answers, such as how to treat blisters and what is the name of a male ballerina.)

All I did was take a container of lotion that I emptied and fill it with mayonnaise.  

It smelled terrible.

So we added vanilla and many other different good smelling things.

It was like a sour smelling contraption of vanilla and grease.

I brought it to my first class of the day.  

I played with it in my hands for like three minutes before I got the courage to ask my friend if she wanted to use some.

She asked: "What's it smell like?"

Me: "Oh it's coconut. (cause that was the label).  But it kind of smells like vanilla."

Then she lifted it from my hand and smelled it.

"EW!  That's gross." -Friend.

Great.  My plan was foiled.  Foiled foiled foiled.

Another guy came up and asked to smell it...

Then he said to me:

"That is DISGUSTING! Put that on your hands! Rub it on your face!

It looks like a milkshake."

I was caught.  Like a robber holding a bag of jewels in the jewelry store.  With shining cop lights and "PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR, MA'AM!"

So I did it.  

I rubbed it on my hands.  And they got all greasy.

THE SMELL WAS PUTRID.

I had to lie and say: 

"Really guys?  I LIKE this lotion!!!"

I then proceeded to excuse myself:

"I have to go to the bathroom...."

Then I washed my hands.

And I didn't want to keep the crappy mayo lotion, so I had to inconspicuously leave it on class on the table.

I was afraid they would say:

"Oh mallory you forgot your lotion!"

They were probably too afraid of it.

I despise that lotion.

I had secret hopes that future classes would pick it up and put the lotion on....

BEFORE THEY SMELLED IT.

-Mallory

P.S.  I had a different successful April Fool's joke.  I put fake parking tickets on random cars in the parking lot.  They offense was "parking like a retard."
Don't sue me.  Don't arrest me.  Is that illegal?  It was fun.  Besides the fact that my fingers almost (literally) FROZE OFF.

It was a cool day.

I like new beginnings.  

-Mallory